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September 24, 2008 / merlisser

100 Things about me

  1. I am Melissa
  2. I am female
  3. I am an actual female as opposed to some old guy pretending to be female to mess with people’s minds.
  4. I am 35.
  5. I am an attorney.
  6. I used to be an investigator, similar to Veronica Mars.
  7. I still miss that show (Veronica Mars).
  8. I was born in Arkansas.
  9. I currently live in Arkansas.
  10. I used to live other places like Washington DC.
  11. I miss many of the urban amenities of a large east coast city.
  12. I am 5’10”
  13. I have always been the tallest girl, and sometimes the tallest person, in my class. Right down to kindergarten.
  14. I enjoy being tall.
  15. I used to be thin but now i am not.
  16. I am currently losing weight and have lost over 30 pounds this year.
  17. I like running.
  18. It is one of my “life goals” to run a marathon.
  19. Yes I keep a list of life goals or a “bucket list” if you will. It keeps me on track and focused when times are tough.
  20. I also keep a cool shit I have done list which reminds me that my life doesn’t suck as much as I think it does when times are tough. It keeps me grateful.
  21. Another thing on my life is to walk on the Great Wall of China.
  22. I have already walked across the Brooklyn Bridge. Amazing view.
  23. I spent a summer in New York City–living in Manhattan and working in Brooklyn.
  24. I love both dogs and cats and so I can’t really be considered a “dog” or “cat” person.
  25. Those decals with “Calvin” from “Calvin and Hobbes” peeing on things annoy the crap out of me.
  26. Those decals with Calvin praying annoy me as well. It seems a little odd to denote something sacred on the back of your car or truck.
  27. My favorite restaurant in Arkansas is Star of India.
  28. I love Indian food. If Indian food was a man, I would marry Indian food and have his babies WITHOUT A PRENUP. Yeah that’s love, y’all.
  29. I have seen Aretha Franklin perform live.
  30. I took over 12 years of piano lessons.
  31. According to legend, I am very talented at the piano.
  32. I think “La fille aux cheveux de lin” by Claude Debussy is one of the most beautiful piano solos ever written.
  33. Yes I can play La fille aux cheveux de lin!!!!!
  34. I have one younger brother.
  35. My favorite candy is red hots.
  36. I can’t sing worth a damn.
  37. I like to read.
  38. Some of my favorite books are “Lolita” by Nabakov, “Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil” by John Berendt, “The Sound and the Fury” by William Faulkner, and “Prozac Nation” by Elizabeth Wurtzel.
  39. I was a “Legal observer” during the 2000 IMF/World Bank protests. I learned that “tear gas” is a base and putting a towel soaked in Vinegar on your head makes it hurt less.
  40. While I was taking my first ever law school exam, someone broke into my apartment, ransacked the place, and stole my stuff. Yeah I had 3 more exams to go.
  41. I seem to be a crime magnet:
  42. burglarized apartment YES!
  43. hit by a drunk driver YES!
  44. sexual assault YES!
  45. car window broken and petty theft of items inside the car YES!
  46. death threats YES!
  47. and oh and my cat died because a rottweiller who wasn’t leashed or penned up tried to eat him. YES another crime. See. MAGNET BABY!
  48. I can’t cook worth a damn.
  49. I’m quite a slob if I allow myself to be.
  50. Actually, I hate cleaning and “allowing myself” isn’t that hard. I have to try real hard to keep things neat.
  51. I am always trying to improve myself. I guess it’s lifelong learning.
  52. My grandma farms cotton.
  53. My Dad builds houses.
  54. The first time I shot a BB gun, I was 7.
  55. When I was a child, I wanted to be a concert pianist when I grew up and perform in Carnegie Hall.
  56. I like watching movies.
  57. Some of my favorite movies are “Kill Bill Volume 1”; “Blue Crush”; Gone with the Wind; The English Patient; The Shawshank Redemption; Chasing Amy; Heathers; and “Pulp Fiction”
  58. My favorite movie of 2008 (this year) is “The Dark Knight”
  59. Boiled Okra creeps me out. It looks like giant boogers. EWWWWW!
  60. I don’t have any children. I’m not too keen on having one. I don’t want to inflict myself on a poor baby.
  61. I love driving fast. I also like road trips.
  62. I have straddled the equator in Kenya.
  63. I volunteered to help build a school in Kenya.
  64. I have also went on safari in Kenya.
  65. Yes folks, I do want to go back to Kenya.
  66. When I was in DC, I missed Waffle House’s scattered and covered hash browns.
  67. Now I miss Chicago deep dish pizza, mole pablano and some noodle dish from the Burmese restaurant in Chinatown.
  68. I got this birth mark on my elbow that always looks like dirt. It’s shaped like Australia but it just looks like I really need a bath.
  69. 69 ?? whoo hooooo!!!
  70. I love pizza. All kinds of pizza. Pizza is tasty.
  71. Can you tell I’m hungry right now?
  72. I am fairly liberal, politically speaking and tend to vote Democrat.
  73. Lightning fascinates me.
  74. I have one grandparent still living.
  75. Breezy the bichon frise is the best dog EVER! Shut up. She is.
  76. Once when I was 3 or 4, I put a metal bobby pin into an electrical socket to see what would happen.
  77. I blame all my “issues” on that. I fried my brain. I FRIED MY BRAIN!
  78. Yes, Virginia, Melissa has issues.
  79. I have a funny way with words.
  80. I once compared tuna tartare to vagina.
  81. No I’ve never tasted vagina.
  82. Currently, Heroes, Burn Notice, and The Closer are my favorite TV shows.
  83. I have dark brown hair.
  84. I am going gray and have a Lily Munster style street near my temple. (Yes I’m only 35)
  85. And still people always guess that I am younger than I actually am.
  86. I am misanthropic and goofy at the same time.
  87. I’m not too optimistic about the world.
  88. I love to dance in rainstorms when it’s not too cold.
  89. While typing this list, I am craving chips and salsa.
  90. I like collecting quotations and subscribe to one of those “quote of the day” emails.
  91. I live in a dry county. It’s annoying. Driving 30 something miles to buy some booze. OY!
  92. When I was a kid, I thought Florence the Maid from the Jeffersons was the coolest person ever. She had the best sassmouth ever.
  93. I still have an affinity for the sassy backtalk. Oh I could get in so much trouble if I opened my mouth.
  94. I’m running out of things to list. Now I am fearing that I am dull.
  95. I can be quite anxious from time to time.
  96. Minimum Wage by They Might Be Giants always makes me giggle.
  97. I love stationery and have far too many note cards to ever actually send.
  98. Melissa means “honey bee” in Greek
  99. I love Flannery O’Connor. She cracks me up.
  100. I’m so glad I’m done with this list. WHEW!


Leave a Comment
  1. jennybee / Oct 10 2008 2:42 pm

    Your life is way more interesting than most people’s I know. Never doubt that. You’re one insanely un-dull woman.

  2. merlisser / Oct 12 2008 5:18 am

    Thank you. Thank you very much.

  3. Jordan / Jun 10 2009 11:24 am

    I concur, on you being insanely un-dull. It’s good to see someone not loose dullness after college (it’s sad, but it happens, it happens so much in this country). Also, Lolita’s one of the best books ever 😀

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